Further to my drivelous post of yesterday...
Hypochondria. Don't know what it is? Google it! Don't know something - just Google it.
Feeling like shyte? Google your symptoms and make you own diagnosis! Anything you want to know is a mere few keystrokes away, what's not to love about that?! Should be great shouldn't it, but there are times when it isn't.
Hypochondria - a health anxiety/ phobia / mental illness where a person has excessive preoccupying concerns for his or her health depite there being no presence of a medical condition. Kind of explains ME! except, what if I pass it off as the anxiety and there really is something wrong? Gah.
True to the nature of Hypochondria where the health concern is typically limited to a particular 'issue', sometimes 2, Mine is the big C.
The problem? It's inescapable! I can do everything I possibly can (and I'd like to think I am) and still not escape it! I can improve my diet but that doesn't stop it from entering the mind! If the mind itself is a very pervasive tool, the media is probably moreso! Somebody of notable popularity dies of the big C, & it's on the news - hour after hour after hour - then it's on TV!!!!! Pick up a magazine & there it is nestled in the glossy pages of galloping gossip. Borrow a fab book from the library just to have it turn to crap at page 453. No radio, no TV, no magazines, no interweb, no fictitious Chick-Lit. Oh, no socialising either just incase someone refers to someone else who has/had it. Pretty hard to escape it when you look at it like that! and time to find a new hobby too!
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
Shyte.
Up until just a little over a week ago, things have been pretty damn good. I went to the Dr's on the 19th for a routine wart cauterization & was sent off with a form for fasting bloods to be done. Come the 22nd, I got them done & have virtually felt like crap since! It feels like every day I've woken up with a headache & since Thursday gone, my gut has felt like rubbish too. I haven't as yet heard any results of my blood tests & invariably no news is good news in this department - my Dr's are very good at calling if something needs putting right BUT.....
I've probably said it before - that I have issues with anxiety & depression & if I have, sorry, I'm saying it again. I know that on the 24th I had a small amount of something that probably could/would have triggered the initial headache. My issue now is wether this is now stress/anxiety related or something much more serious. In typical Amber style, the worst case senario invaribly seems to be the best option for my pathetic little brain to grasp hold of - until proven otherwise.
The brain is a very powerful organ - one that is capable of orchestrating the functions of the whole body with fine presicion. It's also a very powerful organ in terms of thought control. In terms of people that are mentally balanced, this isn't such a bad thing but when you're stressed/anxious/depressed, it's not a good thing at all because that brain can convince you of all manner of things that may or may not be happening. Which is were I am now. A major part of me says that my symptoms indicate a brain tumor, another part of me thinks it's just stress & I've overthought the whole thing and got anxious over it. A third part is trying to tell me that maybe it's menopause messing me around. I read that some say that your mother's age is an indicator for when you're likely to go through menopause but for me at 37, that's another 10 years away. I do have a paternal aunt that was done with the whole deal by 45 though.
I feel like a plane in a holding pattern running out of fuel.
BTW, I have called the Dr's today to find out my results - still waiting for a return call.
edit.
I have just had my return call - everything is fine. Blood Sugars - fine. Cholesterol total level a bit high but my ratio's are very good, Liver Function - fine too & the lovely nurse said that everything else was fine too so why oh why do I feel like shyte?
I've probably said it before - that I have issues with anxiety & depression & if I have, sorry, I'm saying it again. I know that on the 24th I had a small amount of something that probably could/would have triggered the initial headache. My issue now is wether this is now stress/anxiety related or something much more serious. In typical Amber style, the worst case senario invaribly seems to be the best option for my pathetic little brain to grasp hold of - until proven otherwise.
The brain is a very powerful organ - one that is capable of orchestrating the functions of the whole body with fine presicion. It's also a very powerful organ in terms of thought control. In terms of people that are mentally balanced, this isn't such a bad thing but when you're stressed/anxious/depressed, it's not a good thing at all because that brain can convince you of all manner of things that may or may not be happening. Which is were I am now. A major part of me says that my symptoms indicate a brain tumor, another part of me thinks it's just stress & I've overthought the whole thing and got anxious over it. A third part is trying to tell me that maybe it's menopause messing me around. I read that some say that your mother's age is an indicator for when you're likely to go through menopause but for me at 37, that's another 10 years away. I do have a paternal aunt that was done with the whole deal by 45 though.
I feel like a plane in a holding pattern running out of fuel.
BTW, I have called the Dr's today to find out my results - still waiting for a return call.
edit.
I have just had my return call - everything is fine. Blood Sugars - fine. Cholesterol total level a bit high but my ratio's are very good, Liver Function - fine too & the lovely nurse said that everything else was fine too so why oh why do I feel like shyte?
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